Why the hell could you care less?

I could care less about the use of "I could care less". The statement is often used to express that one does not care at all about something. "Did you know that I threw away a tissue?" "I could care less!" I contend that most people who use this phrase mean the opposite. By using this phrase, they are saying that they do care. The correct phrase should be "I couldN'T care less".

Let's say you have a care-o-meter that indicates how much you care. At the top of the meter, you have maximum care-age. The needle would point to the top if you were asked how much you care about the most important thing in the world to you. It would point here if a Notre Dame alum were asked how much he cares about winning a national football title or if Dick Cheney were asked how much he cares about consolidating power in the executive branch. The top of the meter indicates the most you could possibly care.

At the bottom of the meter, you have minimum care-age, where the needle would point if you were asked to how you feel about the least important thing in the world to you. It would point here if the Big 10 commissioner were told that all the fans wanted a college football playoff or if Bush were told that we live in an international community with increasing globalization (in Bush's defense, he might not understand all those words). The bottom of the meter indicates complete apathy.

Now, if you could care less, that indicates that you are NOT at the bottom of the meter. There is still some room between where you are and complete apathy. You still care a little. If you want to say that you do not care at all about something, you have to say that you couldn't care less. That would mean your care level is zero--the bottom of the meter. There is nothing less important to you. 

"People might think you're overly anal for addressing this on your blog." 

"I couldn't care less." If you made it this far in the post, you understand what I'm saying--and that I'm saying it correctly. 

Why make a New Year's resolution?

Why not? Nobody's perfect, but people who don't strive towards something are pretty boring--and unaccomplished. This year, I have resolved to do three things every day: read something substantial, write a paragraph, and do push-ups (note that push-ups is plural). 

Read something substantial. This resolution is really aimed at lab. A discussion with a lab mate made me re-realize that reading is more important than experiments in science. The better experiments become clearer and the big picture becomes bigger and crisper. The past four and a half years, I have spent more time doing than thinking, and doing poorly at that. Granted, too much thinking is a grad student killer, too, but I'm far from that side of the spectrum. The goal is to spend much more time reading and thinking science each day. You may ask, "How could you avoid this during the past four years?" I'd say you'd be surprised at what you can get away with, and besides, it's not like I've earned the PhD yet. 

Write a paragraph. I've always said that I wanted to be a writer, and I am seriously considering giving it a go after grad school (or maybe this summer if I get the fellowship I want). I have a blog; I can start to write a paper (sort of); I will be taking a writing class. Throw in an article or two for school publications, and I'm swimming in opportunities. The goal is to see if I'm actually serious about wanting to be a writer. And if I'm good enough to do it.

Push-ups. The unoriginal goal of fitness. Sadly, I have become very, very, very weak. I mostly blame TV, the media, work, Wii, Call of Duty, and college football. Couple that with climbing and running being enough exercise for me, and my chest and triceps don't see much exercise. I can barely squeeze out 30 now when I used to have 500 in my routine (they may not have been perfect form back then). Plus, they say climbers slouch because of their over-developed back and shoulder muscles. That's not the only reason I slouch, but they say push-ups help balance things out. We'll see how that goes.

I have also resolved not to play Call of Duty unless playing with a friend. That was a major time suck that I majorly sucked at. It was cold turkey January 2 for that one--no more solo shooting.

Why resolve to do anything? I realize that I will probably fail to do each of these each day for the entire year. In fact, yesterday I forgot to do push-ups, and I'd bet that February will find me doing none, if any, of these. The intent is not to be perfect but to improve, to be a better version of the me I envision--at least for a little while.